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The Accident Underwater

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yeah... so... okay.... [26 Apr 2006|02:54pm]
i went ahead and did it.

i have a new name now.


please go to http://www.hailmarythatail.livejournal.com/profile to add me.

thank you.
1 comment|post comment

i kinda wanna leave... [26 Apr 2006|12:21pm]
should i change my livejournal name?

i really don't like falloutboytml... i mean... everyone changes, right?

it's not lame...? is it?

i made this like... i don't even know how long ago... like freshman or sophomore year...

i want to keep all of the same friends... i like reading the people's entries that i have right now, and i'd like to expand and stuff, but i'm afraid if i do, no one will add me.


... or does anyone even read this?
6 comments|post comment

stare into the moment [11 Apr 2006|02:04am]
[ mood | skeptical ]


... uhm....

.... so i don't know about this...

... it's me...

.... &i'm crazy....


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[03 Apr 2006|12:38pm]
[ mood | confused ]

i don't know what to do.

i give up now.

i can't make anyone happy.
not even myself.

i just don't really care anymore, i guess.

4 comments|post comment

hXc roomates, bitch [31 Mar 2006|02:01am]

6 comments|post comment

[20 Mar 2006|06:22pm]
Spring Break was cool. I'm not going to talk about what I did, because it's not like it matters, anyway.

But it was really depressing to have to come back to school. And not only that...but Nikki is here. JEEZ. Double whammy.

Well, I'm going to try and work on my Spanish outline and Rhetoric Paper. Hope all is well with everyone.
5 comments|post comment

That Mouth [02 Mar 2006|12:05am]
As your lover, I have my doubts that you kiss your mother with that mouth. You put it on me. Up and down me. We had a good time crossing those lines. Now that we're friends, it's becoming more and more clear that your vampire boyfriend isn't going anywhere. You put me on. You put on a good show.

(At least I can see myself in the mirror.)

I know about you. It makes me fucking sick. Well, I'm glad you're better now.
2 comments|post comment

[23 Feb 2006|12:20pm]
B e s t

1. Male friend: Chris Ford
2. Female friend: Fran Fazio
3. Vacation: NYC
4. Age: 18
5. Memory: GLTM's last show, Lots of SwA shows

W o r s t

1. Day of the week: sometimes sunday, but i guess monday
2. Food: Seafood
3. Memory: the accident
4. Date: yeah...

L a s t

1. Person you saw: Brodie
2. Talked to on the phone: my mom
3. Hugged: spenser
4. Text messaged: Michelle
5: IM: Nikki

T o d a y

1. What are you doing now: Filling out this thing
2. Tonight: Folding Flyers, probably
3. Wearing: the usual. jeans, t-shirt, copeland hoodie
4. What did you eat for lunch: nothing
5. Better than yesterday: uhm... not necessarily

T o m o r r o w

1. Is: Friday
2. Got any plans: the show at the vaudiville
3. Goal: play well for chris
4. Dislikes about tomorrow: i have a quiz in computer science
5. Do you have work: no way

F a v o r i t e s

1. Number: 7
2. Song: that's hard. right now it's probably "Honk+Wave"
3. Color: Red.
4. Season: Summer
5. State: Iowa

C u r r e n t l y

1. With someone: No.
2. Alone while doing this?: brodie just walked in
3. Missing some one?: yes.... :(
4. Mood?: okay....
5. Wanting: someone to care about me
3 comments|post comment

[21 Feb 2006|03:19am]
[ mood | annoyed ]

i drank that cherry coke too late. now i can't go to sleep.

and i have heartburn.

we just watched sahara. it was okay.

haha. brodie makes funny noises in his sleep.

i wish i could stop thinking about stuff if i know it's going to make me upset. it's so stupid. everything about it. it makes me want to just freak out and cry (which i never do) or throw something (which i always do). i really just don't understand, but i've given up. i just keep telling myself "fuck it" and eventually it will go away. i don't need this.

i have a quiz at 10:30 tomorrow. i probably won't do that well. i'm going to be so tired.

i am going to pee and then lie back down. i have more i want to say, but it will have to wait until next time....as;kldgashdg;lasjdglasjdl;fjsadl;fasfs... if i choose to waste your time again

5 comments|post comment

what happened? [15 Feb 2006|01:32pm]
[ mood | blank ]

it was so nice out yesterday and now it's all cold and stuff again.
it's okay. maybe it'll snow a little bit more. at least if it's cold, i want it to snow some.

i was really tired when i first woke up, but then during rhetoric i was fine and i practiced my speech and really gave a lot of thought into my comments. then in computer science, i was looking around and everyone else was falling asleep and i was awake and learning. that's pretty sweet.
also, during that class i was thinking about how i think it'd be really cool to be a camera man. you know... like on the set of movies, or even just like for news casters and stuff like that. i dont' know why... but it seems intriguing. i don't know what the major for that would be, though.

i am giving a speech on Limbeck's "Honk + Wave" for my song analysis in Rhetoric. I realized today that everyone says "uhm..." way to much in their speeches. I was even thinking about it and I said it. I got upset and made a face every time i said it. i drew to go last, though. that was funny.
i have to start thinking of a film with a major controversey in it to talk about and analyze in a 5-7 page paper. Crash immediately comes to mind, but i've already written a paper on that movie... anyone have any ideas?

i've been planning on coming to des moines tomorrow. but then i have to come back for classes on friday and then go right back home that night. that's a lot of gas. and i have to do that one other week, too. so... i'm not really sure what's going on yet, but i really want to go to that show.

i'm really excited for the show on saturday. it's going to be sweet.

i deleted the last entry i made because i don't want to make people feel bad. that's dumb.
but just so you know, i miss you... like... a lot.

anyway... i think i should go now. my spanish oral assesment isn't going to practice itself.

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i'll wait for you [06 Feb 2006|01:34pm]
All in a day,
See it for yourself,
I'll make no change,
When you are somewhere else,
And I'll write for you,
Every chance I get,
Tell me you'll listen,
And say me you won't forget.

And I'll never say I don't have time, when you need me with you,
I'll stand in line, if you want me to, and I'll wait for you,
I'll wait for you.

See it for yourself,
I'll make no plans,
When you are somewhere else,
And I'll sing for you,
Songs that no one hears,
But tell me you'll listen,
And say I'll have your ears.

And I'll never say I don't have time, when you need me with you,
I'll stand in line, if you want me to, and I'll wait for you,
I'll wait for you.

And if you have something to say,
Know I won't look away,
No, I won't look away.

And I'll never say I don't have time, when you need me with you,
I'll stand in line, if you want me to, and I'll wait for you,
I'll wait for you.

I'll keep on waiting for you,
You'd wait for me, whoa,
I'll keep on waiting for you,
You'd wait for me (yeah) whoa,
I'll keep on waiting for you,
You'd wait for me, whoa,
I'll keep on waiting for you (I'll keep on waiting)
You'd wait for me, whoa,
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everything you own ends up owning you [24 Jan 2006|02:40am]
i think things are happening. we're changing. it might be a matter of just talking and getting through things.

a process of learning... it just takes time.

i don't know really what's going on, but it's hard, i know.

my mind is very shortcoming. it can't handle too much. i feel like a flat spare tire. i feel like a burnt out replacement bulb. i don't even know what i feel like.

what really matters right now? happiness?
"are we really happy with who we are right now?"
what is happy?

if you can't be content with yourself... will you ever be content with someone else?
grrrr.... why am i still awake?!

i can't sleep anymore. i'm never tired when i need to sleep and i want to sleep when i shouldn't be tired.

tomorrow i'm going to learn about why water is so important in our bodies. H2O, that is.

this isn't organized. my thoughts are NEVER organized. questions? answers.


1 comment|post comment

you [02 Jan 2006|01:44am]
you're the only thing that makes me happy nowadays

from the minute i leave the only thing i look forward to is seeing you again

just spending time with you is so much more than i could ever ask for

you're the best thing that could ever happen to me

you're my everything

i am in love with you


5 comments|post comment

the better part of me is stolen whenever you go [20 Dec 2005|06:57pm]
[ mood | sick ]

i told you i always thought much too deeply!! way too "in depth".

after having the university's internet for about four months, i absolutely HATE aol. i mean, i probably would, anyway, but having fast, awesome internet for a really long time makes it much worse.

this week is going to suck A LOT. i just want it to be christmas already!! JC!!

i love knowing that i'm making money. it feels good not to be in debt and stuff...?


dude... i'm wearing sweat pants. that's really wierd. i NEVER wear sweat pants... WTF?!


"Dodging broken down satellites
Mending my beaten up jaw line
Last night I stayed on call all night
And I watched her die three times tonight"

4 comments|post comment

i can't remember anything...? [12 Dec 2005|08:59pm]
[ mood | weird ]

i've changed so much.

i've learned a lot.

i feel like i don't know anything, honestly.

i think about it a lot, sometimes.
since then i think way differently.

i get scared a lot, too.

the other night i was walking out to the tracker from Brodie's apartment... and it just really freaked me out. i stepped in a big puddle and i yelled really loud. i got to the car and just stood there. my foot was freezing, but my brain was racing, thinking about everything and why everything's the way it is.

the drive home that night was miserable. i couldn't see the road through the tears.

no one knows the real truth, and it kills me.

i say i don't remember, but i do...
i think.

sometimes i hate having emotion. i wish my brain didn't think way too deep into things. sometimes i feel like it thinks it's way smarter than it is, and it tries to figure everything out. analyze.

everything's so complex. or is it simple?

do you think about the big things? or the little things?

do you try to see through things? or look around them?

once, i promised myself i understood. i looked at everything at the same way. for awhile i thought things made sense. i don't know what i was thinking.

i think i'm just letting it freak me out. i'm not smart enough to figure anything out.

i'm not going to do the "just give up" thing.
i'm not going to think way in depth.

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

i'm really sorry.

7 comments|post comment

My year. [09 Dec 2005|11:42am]
[ mood | chipper ]

1. Did you have a new year's resolution this year? No.
2. Does it snow where you live? Yes.
3. Do you like hot chocolate? Sometimes.
4. Have you ever been to Times Square to watch the ball drop? No.
5. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? Yes. My cousin Laruen.

1. Who was your valentine this year? No one.
2. What did you get your valentine? Nothing.
3. What did your valentine get you? A card.
4. When you were little, did you buy valentines for your whole class? Yes.
5. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday this month? Yes. Brodie.

1. Are you Irish? Probably a little.
2. Do you wear green on St. Patty's Day? No.
3. What did you do for St. Patty's day? Nothing.
4. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? I don't know.

1. Do you like the rain? Yes!
2. Did you play an April fool's joke on anyone this year? Yes. My mom and people at school.
3. Do you get tons of candy on Easter? Yeah.
4. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? Yeah.

1. What's your favorite kind of flower? Dandelions.
2. Do you like the spring? Yes.
3. Finish the phrase: April showers bring may flowers... las;jdf;;laskdfj
4. What would you think of as a spring color? Green.
5. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? I'm not sure.

1. Did you go on any vacations last June? No.
2. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?Yes.

1. What did you do on the 4th of July? Went out to Chelsea's boat and then hung out at her house until really late.
2. Do you go on any vacations during this month? No. (Adventureland. hahahahahaha)
3. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? I do. Fran does. My cousin Brock does.

1. Do you do anything special to end off your summer? Not really.
2. What was your favorite summer memory of '05? Joining SwA and recording. RECORDING.
3. Do you go swimming a lot in the summer? Um... not really, actually.
5. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? My dad.

1. Did you attend school/college in '05? Yes.
2. Who is/was your favorite teacher? Prof. Estudillo
3. Do you like fall better than summer? Not really.
4. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? Yeah.

1. What was your favorite Halloween costume ever? This one weird guy at Eric's party.
2. What's your favorite candy? Kit-Kat!!
3. What did you dress up like this year? Nothing... (The bass player from GLTM)
4. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? I don't know...

1. Whose house do you usually go to for Thanksgiving? Grandma's.
2. Do you like stuffing? No!!
3. What are you thankful for? Family, Friends, Music, etc.
4. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? Royce, Spenser, Michelle

1. Do you celebrate Christmas? Heck yes!!!
2. Have you ever been kissed under mistletoe? Yes.
3. What do you want this year for Christmas? Nothing.
4. What's the best present you ever got for Christmas? Probably my regular Nintendo plus hundreds of other things when I was a spoiled brat at 4 years old.
5. Do you like cold weather? Yeah.
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? My mom and Grandpa.
7. What is your favorite holiday? CHRISTMAS, DUH!!!!

3 comments|post comment

i am in love and it is amazing!!!!!!!!!!! [05 Dec 2005|08:15pm]
EMOshell: i just want to be with you sooo bad right now. i feel like i can't even think straight.
hailmarythatails: whoa..... um..... i honestly, like 100% not even joking, was just going to say that
hailmarythatails: the "i can't even think straight" part
hailmarythatails: i swear. that's sooo wierd.
hailmarythatails: weird*
EMOshell: jldasjf;las!! :-)
EMOshell: i stole it out of your head.
hailmarythatails: you really can read my mind.
hailmarythatails: wow.
hailmarythatails: what am i think about now?
EMOshell: &i know what you're thinking about right..........NOW!
EMOshell: kissing me, duh. :-D
hailmarythatails: laksdl;jkashdgkl!!
hailmarythatails: sorry. that was too easy.
hailmarythatails: um... okay. what about... NOW?!
EMOshell: =-O
EMOshell: naughtyyyyy.
hailmarythatails: p[;'jk 'ahl;w ujhtpaw'jk gvjdopgvtjqw!!~!!!!!!!2
hailmarythatails: GGD
hailmarythatails: OH MY GOSH!!
hailmarythatails: seriously.
hailmarythatails: that freaks me out.
EMOshell: hahahaha
4 comments|post comment

a sad, sad day [30 Nov 2005|08:51pm]
Image hosted by TinyPic.com

GLTM's last showCollapse )

3 comments|post comment

Stuck with Arthur pictures [29 Nov 2005|09:38pm]
Image hosted by TinyPic.com

Junkyard ShowCollapse )

5 comments|post comment

Thank you. [24 Nov 2005|11:18am]
[ mood | thankful ]

Happy thanksgiving.

I'm thankful for:

1. MY MOM, MY DAD, and the rest of MY FAMILY and their wonderful support
2. MICHELLE for being my best friend and the best girlfriend ever
3. SPENSER for being an awesome roomate and for understanding me
4. MY FRIENDS (if you're reading this, I am thankful for you) and their ability to make me happy and always be there for me
7. NORTHSTAR for being the best group of musicians to ever set foot on this planet
8. PERKINS for feeding me
9. GOODWILL, SALVATION ARMY, and KOHL'S(haha) for giving me clothes to wear
10. DOWNTOWN DES MOINES and JAVA JOE'S for all of the amazing nights
11. SASSY for loving me and hating everyone else
12. and last but not least, I am thankful for all of the WONDERFUL FOOD I get to eat around this time of year.

3 comments|post comment

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